I expected myself to know nothing about how the real legal profession works the moment I decided to be an attachment student, and that is why I have to learn as much as I can from every opportunitiy that I could possibly get.
The fourth day of intern is just few more hours to come, yet, I found myself to have lost.
From what my masters told me, I interpreted it as knowing nothing is not important as long as you want to learn, I mean learn from the heart.
Not feeling shameful to share that I had got myself scolded today by who I have have admired long since the first time I watched him speak as a lawyer. There are billions of exellence lawyers out there but not all are to be admired, and humbly saying that I am so very lucky to have two incredible one as my masters at the same time, this is amazing, isn't it!
Back to the main point,I know by myself that it was my wrong, which I should have think before I do anything, and make it clear about what and why I am doing, not to mention thinking twice. These were also advices from him the very first time we sat down and talked.
I am feeling so shameful, not because I got scolded, but that I never take my brain out of the room. Maybe they have already expected an intern student to be their burden, but I should not have taken that for granted, which I never do, seriously. I just feel so very guilty for making extra trouble, more when I could not do anything to reduce their burden at this moment.
At one point, I start to think of the reason which had put myself in this position. The conclusion which I could get is that maybe I haven't know what I actually want in life yet. That's why I always lost. Worst thing is that I am having no solution.
Maybe, this is not something that I should have avoided right now, but to learn from it. Life isn't easy, but not very tough also. Life isn't short, but isn't really long also. I have better appreciate everything that happens in my life, they are meant for me, and this is my life. Things happen for a reason, you never forget that right Chai Hong.
After all, we are all humans.
1 comment:
Scoldings are perfectly normal (arguably inherent) in any kind of job. Worry not, even the veteran who scolded you was once in your position. Most important is to learn from past mistakes. Working is indeed very much different from studying, but I believe you're settling in the right path by doing the attachment programme - it's an opportunity to expose yourself to procedural law in addition to substantive law that you learn in college. Good luck! :)
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